Even though she had protected us from many dangers…some we never even knew about, we were unable to do the same for her when she needed us.Continue reading “The One Who Protects”
I love memories of the sound of Mom’s sewing machine, starting and stopping, her hands flattening the fabric on each side of the needle as she guided it under the light on her machine, her foot pressing the foot peddle below. I still remember the smell of new fabric and the delicate, crinkly feel of patterns too.Continue reading “Stitching Memories Together”
The words to the song, “The Cat’s in the Cradle”, twist and squeeze my heart. The children are grown and gone…and now there’s only a cat in the cradle. Where did our babies go? Weren’t they in the cradle just yesterday?
Soaking Up Family Time
Remember when family just showed up at the house, sometimes with a casserole, sometimes with a suitcase for spending the night? They didn’t call first…they just knocked on the door, and we answered without knowing first who was on the porch. Tea was made, leftover fried chicken was warmed up, and extra chairs were pulled in from other rooms. Stories were shared while chatter and laughter filled the room, and a dusty box of old pictures, dried corsages, military medals and more treasures was pulled out of the closet. Children sat cross-legged on the floor, their minds and hearts soaking up stories they would tell their own children and grandchildren one day.
The Dusty Old Box
One of the most important lessons cancer has taught me is…
pay close attention…life is brief…spend time wisely.
I recently read a book about how we’ve exchanged “the important for the urgent”. Somehow we’ve allowed what seems urgent to consume our time, and there’s no time left for what’s important. In fact, we have started believing that what is most important is that which is urgent.
We don’t notice it’s happening until one day we watch as the children blow the dust off the old box in the closet and carefully lift off the lid. When we see only disappointment on their little faces, we look inside the box and find that there are no stories, no old pictures, no treasures…but rather copies of calendars, planners, post-it notes, and lists of things to do. It’s too late to change what’s stored in the box by that time. We can’t get those days back, and the people who lived the history are gone, along with the stories they loved to tell. Is this old box all there is to pass on to future generations?
Alzheimer’s & Unanswered Questions
When we knew Alzheimer’s was bearing down on Mom and Dad, I wish I had handled things differently. Why didn’t I ask more questions? Listen more closely? Write more down? I knew I had little time between the day of the diagnosis and the day their lives would be ravaged by the disease. I wanted to ask more questions, but I allowed fear to win…I was so afraid of them thinking I was preparing for what we all dreaded. Now, the questions remain unanswered, and the only ones who could answer them are gone. What would Mom and Dad have wanted to tell me, if only I had asked and listened closely?
If only time travel were real… I checked the cradle just to be sure, but only the cat was there.
Thank you for spending some of your precious time here,
Even if you’ve heard “The Cat’s in the Cradle”, it’s worth listening to again: https://youtu.be/KUwjNBjqR-c
“Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow.” Psalm 144:4
** I did reach over 100 subscribers!!! Thank you!!! I haven’t received a response from the person who won the drawing…so check your email to be sure it isn’t you. If I don’t hear something this week, I’ll draw a new name. Thank you again!!! **
I wrote Dancing Around the Chaos for those who are on the ALZ journey with loved ones…struggling to figure it out and dreading what the next day will bring…but too exhausted and afraid to think beyond the present. It happens to also be a sweet and tender love story that really happened, whose characters are real people. Find it on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2v2paXK
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Our road trip to see Mom and Dad took about 8 hours, and we usually made the trip over a weekend, between work weeks. Sometimes, we stayed longer…Christmas, for instance. A longer visit, we learned, can shed a harsh and truthful light, exposing hidden things.
We realized that Mom and Dad could pull it together, put on a good front, cover for one another, and make things seem fairly normal for a day or two. If the visit was any longer, it was too hard to keep up the charade, and things started unraveling around the edges. This was hard work, and they must have been worn to a frazzle by the time we left. We were for sure.Continue reading “Boxing Up Alzheimer’s for the Attic”
It was just two days before Christmas when Dad and I sat on the porch rockers, listening to Christmas music. His words had deserted him by that time, but we didn’t need them. We enjoyed the cool, crisp air of a Texas December, held hands and listened to the good news of a baby born in a manger. We didn’t know he would be gone just a few days later. It was a sweet and precious time, and I’ll never forget it.Continue reading “The Gift That Changed Everything”
The appearance of the apples was misleading. Their looks, in fact, could have caused them to be ignored as they fell to the hard, West Texas ground with a thud. Beneath the mottled skin though, they were still apples, sweet and delicious, like other apples who look just fine on the outside. If only apples could talk, they would be sure we knew there was still a treasure to be found inside.
It’s been well over 2 years since Dad moved on to his heavenly home, but some days the grief is still fresh…as if it just happened. Even after all this time, on occasion, I think of something I need to call him about…but oh yeah…I can’t pick up the phone and call him anymore. On days like that, I spend a little time with a bear, remembering those bear hugs.
May 21, 2018 is a date I’ll remember forever. I can’t believe a whole year has passed. It’s been much different than we had imagined.Continue reading “The Good News / Bad News Day”
I love these words…”We may not know what lies ahead of us, but we can be absolutely certain of Who is with us.” God sees every detail of our lives…the moments of happiness as well as the hard days. I hope you find many blessings in 2019, no matter the journey you are on.
The following post is from a daily devotional called (in)courage (https://www.incourage.me). I receive it via email and requested permission to share it here with you because the words are so appropriate and true as we enter 2019.
Family members who remember very little from the past, sometimes find that memories are stirred at Christmastime as they celebrate family traditions. They are often the very ones who started the traditions we celebrate today. Even though they appear to have no memories or connections to the past, we don’t know what may be stirring in their minds as they listen to Christmas music, hear the sounds of laughter as children open gifts, and get a taste of those holiday recipes.