The Cat’s in the Cradle

The words to the song, “The Cat’s in the Cradle”, twist and squeeze my heart. The children are grown and gone…and now there’s only a cat in the cradle. Where did our babies go? Weren’t they in the cradle just yesterday?


Soaking Up Family Time

Remember when family just showed up at the house, sometimes with a casserole, sometimes with a suitcase for spending the night? They didn’t call first…they just knocked on the door, and we answered without knowing first who was on the porch. Tea was made, leftover fried chicken was warmed up, and extra chairs were pulled in from other rooms. Stories were shared while chatter and laughter filled the room, and a dusty box of old pictures, dried corsages, military medals and more treasures was pulled out of the closet. Children sat cross-legged on the floor, their minds and hearts soaking up stories they would tell their own children and grandchildren one day.

The Dusty Old Box

One of the most important lessons cancer has taught me is…

pay close attention…life is brief…spend time wisely.

I recently read a book about how we’ve exchanged “the important for the urgent”. Somehow we’ve allowed what seems urgent to consume our time, and there’s no time left for what’s important. In fact, we have started believing that what is most important is that which is urgent.

We don’t notice it’s happening until one day we watch as the children blow the dust off the old box in the closet and carefully lift off the lid. When we see only disappointment on their little faces, we look inside the box and find that there are no stories, no old pictures, no treasures…but rather copies of calendars, planners, post-it notes, and lists of things to do. It’s too late to change what’s stored in the box by that time. We can’t get those days back, and the people who lived the history are gone, along with the stories they loved to tell. Is this old box all there is to pass on to future generations?

Alzheimer’s & Unanswered Questions

When we knew Alzheimer’s was bearing down on Mom and Dad, I wish I had handled things differently. Why didn’t I ask more questions? Listen more closely? Write more down? I knew I had little time between the day of the diagnosis and the day their lives would be ravaged by the disease. I wanted to ask more questions, but I allowed fear to win…I was so afraid of them thinking I was preparing for what we all dreaded. Now, the questions remain unanswered, and the only ones who could answer them are gone. What would Mom and Dad have wanted to tell me, if only I had asked and listened closely?

If only time travel were real… I checked the cradle just to be sure, but only the cat was there.

Thank you for spending some of your precious time here,


Even if you’ve heard “The Cat’s in the Cradle”, it’s worth listening to again:

“Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow.” Psalm 144:4

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I wrote Dancing Around the Chaos for those who are on the ALZ journey with loved ones…struggling to figure it out and dreading what the next day will bring…but too exhausted and afraid to think beyond the present. It happens to also be a sweet and tender love story that really happened, whose characters are real people. Find it on Amazon:

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The Gift That Changed Everything

It was just two days before Christmas when Dad and I sat on the porch rockers, listening to Christmas music. His words had deserted him by that time, but we didn’t need them. We enjoyed the cool, crisp air of a Texas December, held hands and listened to the good news of a baby born in a manger. We didn’t know he would be gone just a few days later. It was a sweet and precious time, and I’ll never forget it.

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Apple Memories

The appearance of the apples was misleading. Their looks, in fact, could have caused them to be ignored as they fell to the hard, West Texas ground with a thud. Beneath the mottled skin though, they were still apples, sweet and delicious, like other apples who look just fine on the outside. If only apples could talk, they would be sure we knew there was still a treasure to be found inside.

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Bear Hugs

It’s been well over 2 years since Dad moved on to his heavenly home, but some days the grief is still fresh…as if it just happened.  Even after all this time, on occasion, I think of something I need to call him about…but oh yeah…I can’t pick up the phone and call him anymore.  On days like that, I spend a little time with a bear, remembering those bear hugs.

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Hold My Hand & Walk With Me

It was October…a little chilly with clear skies and lots of Texas sunshine.  Microphones were being checked; someone was singing on the stage.  We took turns pulling the children through the park in the wagon, searching for the perfect place for a family picture.  Chatter and quite laughter filled the air as we watched other families taking their pictures too.  We were there to take a long walk together, and memories of other walks scrolled across my mind.

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My Naomi

My Naomi was young at heart, and that youthfulness must have spilled over to her good looks. She loved to laugh….I wonder now…could this have been her secret remedy against wrinkles and frown lines? It’s possible, of course, since laughter is the best medicine after all! She was active, always busy, and took very good care of herself.

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The Bush Family & Memories Made in a Yellow House

Dad seemed confused, so I found some pictures to show him. We looked at a picture of him and Mom dancing at our son’s wedding; he liked the picture but didn’t know the people. We looked at pictures of him as a young boy and a picture of his father. When I pulled out the picture of the yellow house, nothing about it registered with him either. He seemed more settled, but I realized, once again, that none of those memories, even of this very special house, were still tucked away in his mind.

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Writing the Book – Sharing the Journey

release day finally arrived for Dancing around the Chaos!

After thinking about this book for years, it’s finally a reality!  It’s hard to believe there is an actual book I can hold.  I hope Mom and Dad would be proud of me.  Even after all these years, I want to please them.  I do know they would like hearing about the people who read their story and what a difference it made in their Alz Journey or even what a difference it made in their commitment to those they love.

In the early days of the disease, when I heard stories of others in later stages, I actually thought…”Well, I know that will never happen.”  Little did I know what the future held; I was very naïve.   Many times along the way, I would remember something a friend had shared with me two or three years prior, and reality would settle in.  We were there; those things were happening.  It was hard, no doubt, but at least I knew others had been down this road.  That gave me comfort.

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